Tuesday, November 27, 2012

not sleeping and seeing things

Once again, I cannot sleep, which is not surprising. I have the worst insomnia known to mankind, it seems. Or at least, that is what it seems like when it flares up. The other night I hallucinated in the middle of the night and saw a woman in a black dress standing in my bedroom closet where the door was open.

I assumed this happened because I'd run out of Vistaril and forgotten to get it refilled for some time.....at least for a week, or maybe longer. So I decided to make sure I got it refilled last night, which I did. But I still didn't sleep well. At least I didn't hallucinate last night though.

It scares me when I get visual hallucinations, because they generally only happen when things are going really badly. And that is not exactly a good sign for the near future. But I'm hoping it was just a fluke.

Anyway, I'll post again when I have something more interesting to talk about.


  1. I hope you get some sleep - insomnia sucks! Why don't we sleep normally? The only way I can sleep all night is if I'm knocked out by some super strong anti-psychotic that I can't wake up from in the morning and keeps me drugged like a zombie all day, and I'm SO OVER THAT!
    You'll find love - I feel that way too when I'm not in a relationship, exactly the way you describe. Maybe we don't love ourselves enough, I'm not sure. I don't have the answers. I just know you sound incredibly nice and have such a good heart that I can't imagine a guy not realizing how lucky he would be to have you. : ) Yes, we do have a mental illness, but with the mental illness comes so many positives that others cannot understand like great compassion and empathy. The right person will see that. : )

  2. I had that the other week, i ran out and didnt sleep all week. I would be laying in bed trying to sleep and thought i would see giant spiders in the corners of the bedroom scurrying about. Ick. Hope you get some rest

  3. I have sleeping issues as well, but I am lucky in the sense that I have never needed a whole lot of sleep. I'm always in your corner, Jen. ~Mary


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